Marry someone, who...

Found this quote today. It makes me feel so thankful for what Max and I have, so I thought I'd share. Hope you're all having a good start to your week!

x Juli

“Marry someone who lets you have a bite of their brownie, even when you said you weren’t hungry. Marry someone who laughs at the same things you do. Marry someone who kisses your nose on a cold day. Marry someone who you can watch Disney movies with. Marry someone who is proud of you whether you earn £5 a week or £5,000 a week. Marry someone who you can tell everything to. Marry someone who isn’t afraid or embarrassed to hold your hand in public. Marry someone who lets you take over when decorating a cake. Marry someone who you can spend the day in Ikea with without feeling stressed. Marry someone who wraps you up inside their coat in the winter. Marry someone who accepts your fears and phobias. Marry someone who gives you butterflies every time you hear their key in the door. Marry someone who you don’t always have to shave your legs for. Marry someone who accepts you all day every day, even when you don’t look or feel your best. Marry someone who puts three sugars in your tea, despite telling them “just the two”. Marry someone who doesn’t judge you when you eat your body weight in cookies. Marry someone who doesn’t make you want to check your phone, because you know they will reply. Marry someone who waits with you to get on the train. Marry someone who understands that you need to be alone sometimes. Marry someone who gets on well with your parents and isn’t uptight about family events. Marry someone who calms you down when you get mad about stupid stuff, and never tells you it’s “only stupid stuff”. Marry someone who makes you want to be a better person. Marry someone who makes you laugh. Marry someone who you love. Marry your soulmate, your lover, your best friend."

Home

You know, being in limbo, apart from missing your lover and best friend, sometimes also means missing your home. Obviously, the worst part about that is missing my man, because he is part of what makes home home. But there's also those little things you miss about your routines or little things that really bugged you about something - which you've now come to appreciate.

Sometimes it's funny thinking about what I consider my home, just because there's plenty of places that could - in theory - be labeled "Juli's home". In theory, I got 4 houses (in Germany) that I know every aspect of. Every hidden detail, every leaking water tap. I can tell you where the tupperware is hidden in each of those households in a second. Right now, I live in my mom's living room. You might think this is what I should call my home (at least for now) - but when I think about home, I think about Max. How he asked me about everything he bought for the apartment (even before we were engaged), how we built our tv-stand together, or how I thought it was really important to have the living room wall covered in pictures of our family.

When I think of home, I think of getting up early. Each of us hiding in the bedroom when the other one would do those embarrassing moves to our workout-dvd. When I think of home I think of walking to the dollar store and spending way too much money on decoration that we didn't need. Max picking me up from a cooking class not even half a mile away. I think of stains in our carpet, washing the dishes, rearranging our furniture and lying on our rug together.

Those places that I know by heart, are all in my heart. They're filled with loved ones and lovely memories. But what you call your home is something that is not only in your heart. It's much more, it fills your whole body, there's smells, feelings, memories that give you goosebumps. It's another thing that when you found it you'll know (you just know).

I miss home!

Juli loves Fall

I'm an October baby. I love it with all it comes - the rain, the colors, the cold, even the storms and darkness. I know people started this thing a while ago; saying fall is their favorite time of the year, and I usually hate when that happens. It's a stupid thing to feel, but every time I enjoy a particular thing and it becomes popular to enjoy it - I abandon it (This happened the first time after the band Rooney played on OC California while I - in my teenage naiveness - assumed me to be the only person to know them). However, the point is - even though I do tend to abandon popular gone things, I still LOVE fall.

It must be a really strong relationship then - mine and fall's, at least after taking that concept into account. Let me explain to you why that is. While people say spring is when people fall in love and summer is when love blooms - I think fall is the time of REAL love. Spring and Summer might be the time when people feel lust or passion, but fall is the time when people get to concentrate on themselves.

So how is that? For once, there's less activities to do outside, we get to sit inside, drink tea, read books and just be for once in the spare time that we have. Our lives get cozy, we get to snuggle in the warmth, knowing the cold is creeping up on us outside. Kind of what we tend to do when we're in love. After all, being in love is just that little bubble that you can concentrate on - that one good thing that's keeping you going - even though you know there's no escape from that big dark cloud called human mortality.

In fall, instead of going to town and surrounding us with all kinds of distractions, we usually surround ourselves with silence. I like silence. It makes you become more aware of who you are, makes you start to think about the world and what you appreciate most. Instead of concentrating on skin and the obvious we concentrate on thoughts and feelings.

Fall makes me focus on what's most important to me - and that's Max.

Juli

(I know I should have substituted 'we' with 'I' - I'm probably just some weird person who's alone with that belief. Additionally, I don't like heat.)

Baking with Juli - Blueberry Cheesecake Cookies

Today I wanted to address the food issue some couple sometimes have when coming from different parts of the world.

Since Max is from the US and I am from Germany we're both used to different kinds of food. Both of us have lived in the others' country for at least 3 months and we both could form opinions on what we like and what we rather not eat everyday.

Max is from Wisconsin, where it seems like everything people eat has to include at least some form of cheese. Which, don't get me wrong, I like cheese, but cheese and cheese can be very different, if you know what I mean. Max has come to love "Brötchen", German bread rolls, now, after despising them in the beginning. Not only is the type of food we are used different, but what you eat to what time is different as well. When we started living together in the beginning of this year, I did not have to go to work and would cook lunch for Max, waiting to eat with him, when he came back from school. After a couple of days he told me how much that confused him, because he was used to eating a light meal as his lunch and the main meal as dinner, at night. Needless to say, eating together was an adjustment for both of us, when cooking at home.

There is food that I do not like that Max would never give up, just as much as there is food that I thoroughly enjoy but just do not know how to properly prepare. I started taking cooking classes back in the US, with the intent to become familiar to home cooked American meals. Since I have some time to kill while I'm waiting for my visa I thought it would be a great idea to try out new recipes that I know Max and I will both enjoy (don't worry I'll still cook German from time to time). Therefore, I want to start a new series where I tryout new stuff that I find online or got recipes for from Max' family and post the results to this page.

The first recipe I tried out is Blueberry Cheesecake Cookies, you can find the original recipe here. I changed the original recipe from going with a blueberry muffin mix to using fresh blueberries, do whatever you like best ;)

I actually made a video for trying it out and out it on youtube too:

What you need:


400 grams  - 2 packs Muffin Mix
113 grams  - 4 oz Cream Cheese
113 grams  - 1 stick (unsalted) Butter
110 grams  - 1/2 cup Brown Sugar
2 eggs
225 grams  - 1 1/2 cups White Chocolate Chips


1. Combine Butter, Cream Cheese and Brown Sugar  in a bowl -mix until smooth
2. Add the eggs - one at a time - mix
3. Gradually add the Muffin Mix
4. Add Chocolate Chips and Blueberries (don't use a mixer - preferably a spoon)
5. Set to chill in a fridge for at leas an hour! (This step is very important - if you skip it the cookies might become flat)
6. Preheat the oven to 160° C (top-/bottom heat)
7. Bake for around 12 minutes (mine took a little longer) until golden brown
8. Enjoy :)

Hope you enjoy the cookies as much as I did :)

Juli

Greetings from the Husband!

    

     My name is Max and I am Julia's Husband. I just found out that Julia was doing this blog and I was eager to submit a post. I think this is a great idea for us to vent some of our frustrations as we navigate through our required separation. 

  As the best and happiest summer of our entire lives comes screaming to a stop, it is just as abruptly becoming a terrible nightmare. Reality has set in, we will now spend the next four months alone separated by 5000 miles.

   Our summer began as soon as the spring semester let out. I finished my last semester exam of Junior year on May 14th and the following day I was on a plane headed for Deutschland. I was off to marry Julia in her home country with all of our family. She had spent her final semester of college living with me in the states and had left for home only a few weeks prior but it felt like we had been separated for an eternity.

         The wedding was amazing. Surely one to be remembered. My family (most of them) had never left the United States so this was a whole new experience for them. My family being primarily of German decent made the trip extra special. Growing up hearing stories from our grandparents about the hinterland has always romanticized Germany for us. Julia and I were equally as excited to have them there with us in that tiny chapel in Tarp as we shared our life long promise to one another.

Where we were married

    After a week my family went back to the states and it was sad to see them go. I really wish that someday they will return for an extended stay. 
 

Family and Friends

      This summer wasn't my first time living in a foreign country but it was definitely a new experience for me. I was eager to get to know my new family and wanted to really soak in the German culture. That I did. 

      Julia's family immediately took me in as there own and showed me nothing but love and kindness. I truly felt accepted and it was such a relief that I fit so well into their family, I should have already known given that given the nature of my wonderful wife.

Julia's Mom's Roses

     After our wedding we took our honeymoon to the Greek Island, Rhodos. Julia must have spent three days straight planning out that perfect vacation and I am so grateful that she did because it was a spectacular trip! And it was badly needed. We were so exhausted after the wedding.

    However, It was also the first time I have ever traveled with Germans and it was a culture shock for me. I cant speak for the entire United States, but where I come from (the Midwest region) people respect personal space. So much so that they would rather be late than try to push and plow through a crowd of strange people. So for me flying with a German airline my stress level was very high but it was worth every second to be with the woman I love on those rocky beaches of the Mediterranean.

At the Beach

Shopping in Rhodos

       Besides marrying the love of my life and our unforgettable honeymoon, the best part of summer was the fact that I got to stay there long enough that me and Julia got to do some really amazing things (we visited German islands, beaches, castles, and cities among other things) but we also got to just be a normal couple for a while, staying in a small town and enjoying each-other. I also got to see her graduate college and it felt so good to be such a proud husband. It was really special. 

A Proud Husband

 

At Movie Park

 

Julia on a ride

At the Beach

        
       Now, it has been seven days since I have seen my wife and at least four months till I see her again. Wow, four months. An eternity. If you have ever been through a painful break up, you may somewhat understand because it kind of feels like that. Only here shes is the one, she is still mine yet I cannot have her. I cannot comfort her the way a normal husband can, I cannot hold her, I cant clean for her, hug her, tease her the way I can when we are together. All I can do is be thankful for the fact that technology allows us to communicate the way we do. It makes our relationship better and stronger, but while you are going through being apart you never truly feel the same as you do when you are together. Maybe for a few moments you can trick yourself to feel numb but within a split second your heart will force your mind to remember. Something will remind me of her at least every 4.5 seconds of the day. 

Tired tourists

      Just last night a character appeared on our favorite vampire show (I was already feeling guilty for watching it without her) named Julia. I was so angry. I couldn't believe someone actually thought they had the right to be named Julia. There is only one woman worthy of that name and that is my wife!!!

     But seriously, this is tough, its hard, and it sucks. But unlike a bad breakup I can wake up every morning knowing I am one day closer. I can feel comfort in the fact that no one in the world can love me more than she does as I her. I am am thankful we can do things like this blog to strengthen our love as we wait for each other. So for now we will live online supporting and loving each other from a far, knowing we are with one another always.

    Thanks for visiting and look for more of our posts. We would love to hear from you.

Welcome, here's our story

I always find it strange to write the first post on a blog; it's almost like I'm writing to myself because there will probably only no to few people be here, reading this. However, let's just hope for that one person that finds their way here to this little glimpse of my life. Welcome! I like you already!

My name is Juli and this blog is intended to be a venting opportunity for me (and maybe, maybe also my husband, Max).

Max and I are both 26 years old, we met last year in January and fell head over heals in love with each other while I was doing a semester abroad in the US. We have been visiting each other since then, and got engaged on my last visit there, in February 2013.

As you can see on the picture, it was very cold. But nevertheless, of course, I got the best proposal ever, from the best man I could possibly ever dream of.  After the engagement we decided that we wanted to live together in the US, but that required me getting a visa. We looked for help in form of lawyers and pretty much got screwed over. They made all kinds of promises including telling me I could come back right after a couple of months and just got our hopes up only to let us down shortly after we paid them. I also have to add those people were recommended to us, we did not take the visa process lightly and wanted to do everything right. However, it all worked out just fine, we found out they were lying to us and found an awesome new lawyer who knew what she was doing and wasn't charging us for 'research on immigration'. I also want to add that we do understand the immigration takes time, the reason we were devastated is because we got our hopes up really high. Well, what can I say, we found out that the couple of months we were having to stay apart turned into approximately a year. Bummer. But no obstacle for our relationship. I mean, our love is so strong and there is nothing we would not do for each other, so having to wait, as hard as it is, is not the worst that could happen to us.

You might notice, we've been moving pretty fast in our relationship. But, it's this weird thing that people call 'you just know' and it all makes sense to you. There is no questioning the relationship, and we both knew from the first day that 'this was it', it never felt like 'just' a relationship, so the next step, getting married, felt just natural to us. And boom - on 27 March we got married in the US.

After the official courtroom wedding, we still felt like the 'real deal' was missing. I had to come back to Germany anyway, because I had a couple of tests left before finishing my degree (additionally, you're only allowed to stay in the US for 90 days when you're on a tourism visa - and those were over too). I kind of spent my last semester of studies in the US without having to be present in school. All my professors required were a presentation and an 24 hours exam to make up for my missed classes. I'm still very grateful to have gotten that opportunity, I mean, who is that lucky. On 25 May we got married in a very nice church ceremony, with all of my family and Max parents and grandparents present. We really are so lucky!

After the wedding, Max and I spent our summer together here in Germany. We had the time of our lives and made some great memories! 

It was so much harder saying goodbye this time, because it wasn't 'his life' and 'my life' anymore, it was 'our life'. I'll miss how he was able to tickle me, without even touching me; how he started watching cheesy vampire shows out of despair; how we never wanted to go to sleep and how I felt so safe around him. Now he's been gone for 2 days and my life just feels in limbo. It's like waiting for this year to go over so I can really star living him, with him. But I also know that we're very lucky to have found each other; we wouldn't be so sad if we weren't that happy.

So, this is it, our story. I feel like I've been ranting a lot, so if you have any questions, just ask :)

X, Juli

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